BACK TO SCHOOL
A personal experience
in learning.
With the promise of each new season, it is a good idea to schedule a
learning experience - one that will provide you with the opportunity to
challenge yourself and ultimately re-ignite the passion for your life’s
work or simply indulge the desire to explore a personal interest. My
most recent educational adventure took the form of a coaching intensive
designed specifically for coaches. One of my personal role models, the
best-selling author and master coach - Cheryl Richardson, was offering
the workshop. The two-day event proved to be more rewarding than I had
anticipated.
Ready, set, go.
Having moved into student mode in my own mind, I prepared for this
seminar by revisiting Ms. Richardson’s work and reviewing the outline
for the workshop – this included personal, skill, relationship &
practice development. Preliminary work along these lines can often
instill you with the confidence necessary to venture into unfamiliar
territory. This applies to anything you have a desire to understand
better – whether it is knitting or tap-dancing. Find an appropriate “For
Dummies” book, or get an educational video that will layout the steps
you need to take to get started. Once you have done a little research,
you will have a better understanding of how much further you are willing
to go with it.
In the thick of it.
Trusting that you have instinctually placed yourself in a situation
designed to help you grow intellectually, emotionally and/or spiritually
usually requires a leap of faith. This is especially true when things
don’t go as expected. At the weekend intensive a guest speaker took the
group in an unexpected direction. This resulted in a passionate
discourse. Although initially uncomfortable, this experience was fraught
with potential. Often, meaningful learning experiences can provoke
strong emotional responses. Be aware of your buttons and who or what has
the ability to push them. Creating a safe space for yourself and those
around you, coupled with the ability to redirect your focus as
situations develop will allow you to take away more than just the
planned curriculum. Be in the moment. Listen.
The morning after.
Cheryl Richardson addressed the concerns of those looking for clarity
and direction with an effortless grace and unreserved honesty. However
many ways the conflict of the earlier evening had been perceived, the
focus would now rest on extracting what would be useful in order to move
forward. Resources and skills that had been the initial focus of the
workshop became more valuable because they were now put to work as a
part of that process. A very tangible group dynamic expanded the
possibilities for growth for every participant on multiple levels. When
everyone involved takes responsibility for their own experience, the
quantity and quality of information, as well as the potential for
learning grows exponentially.
Mind set.
Regardless of what field of study you pursue dedicate the time and
energy it deserves. As an adult we can overlook the influence that a new
field of study can have on other parts of our lives if we revert to the
learning habits we clung to as children. These behaviors need not have
been bad ones - even the most effective ones can become stumbling blocks
if we remain rigid and resist thinking outside of the box – otherwise
known as our comfort zone. Get out of your own way and be open to new
ideas. As Albert Einstein said, “You can’t solve a problem with the same
mind that created it”. So, allow yourself to change your mind when it is
called for.
If you do one thing…
Define a single
subject or skill you have always wanted to try. Something you never got
around to – like swimming or learning a second language. Take the first
steps toward putting your dream directly into action. Find out where
they offer classes in that subject. Make a plan to pay for it and give
yourself a deadline. Investing in your development is the greatest gift
you can give yourself and everyone around you. When someone is engaged
in the pursuit of their passions they become a powerful force of
attraction and a source of inspiration to others.
Recommended Learning:
Boston
Center
for Adult Education
Offering everything from Ballroom Dancing and Cooking to Career
Exploration and Financial Planning.
bcae.org
School of
Fashion
Design
Part time day & evening classes - plus a NEW Saturday schedule,
featuring a professional development series of seminars.
schooloffashiondesign.org
Online Research Trails
Go to Google.com,
enter a subject that has special meaning for you and follow the path
wherever it leads you.
***
Declarations of
Independence
” We hold these truths to be
self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by
their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are
Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
Speak out!
We all
have something to say. Why do we wait for the last straw? So often we
undervalue our opinions, sublimate or dreams or give up basic rights and
privileges that we would never think of denying some else. Ensure that
these fundamentals get the respect they deserve. Take the time to
assemble your truths.
Questions and more questions.
What is
important to you? Sift the through the clutter and confusion. Think
about the people and situations that stand like armed guards between you
and your passion, or you and your peace of mind. You cannot change those
impediments but you can disarm them. If your current employment is the
issue then sit down and make a list of your options. Don’t feel like you
have any? How can you change that? Is it a matter of learning a new
skill? or asserting yourself and your rights on the job?
Do your
homework.
If there
isn’t any money in the budget for school you can make an effort to
educate yourself through alternative methods – internships, on-line
research, volunteering and networking to name a few. No one wants a
confrontation, but there are ways to stand your ground respectfully if
you have taken the time to consider what you will say - and by the same
token, what you would want to hear if your were in their position. The
simple act of putting yourself into the shoes of the object of your
frustration can sometimes be enough to change your perspective enough to
improve a situation. If you believe that you can use some help finding
the empathy to do this check out www.thework.com, which explores the
work of Byron Katie and her book, “Loving What Is”.
When
lightening strikes.
Gather
courage to you. There is a wonderful plot device in the movie Maid In
Manhattan in which a Ralph Fiennes in the role of a politician shares a
trade secret with a young boy played by Tyler Posey who has suffered
from stage fright - a paper clip to hold in his pocket when he is going
to speak in front of an audience. This paperclip becomes a lightening
rod of sorts for all your thoughts and nervous energy. In another
related story Latin singer Marc Anthony was on El Show de Cristina and
she welcomed him with a gift box of rubber bands - because after seeing
the footage of his first appearance on her program years before she
noticed he played with a rubber band to ease his nerves. Who knew an
order of office supplies from Staples would do the trick?
Answer
to a higher power.
Whether
you call it God, the universe or your inner moral compass we all know
innately when we have done the right thing. Trust your instincts. People
are inherently good. Bad choices are another thing altogether. Let us
take a cue from the heroic figures in Boston’s history. Write down your
very own declaration of independence. The quill pen is optional – but if
you need one to make it a more of a production worthy of your words, I
recently spotted one very authentic looking one for sale at Barnes &
Noble, so no excuses!
If you
do one thing…
Be
prepared, be clear, be true, and most importantly be heard!
Recommended Reading
Stand
Up for Your Life – Cheryl Richardson
Life
Is Short-Wear Your Party Pants: Ten Simple Truths That Lead to an
Amazing Life – Loretta Laroche
Dojo
Wisdom: 100 Simple Ways to Become a Stronger, Calmer, More
Courageous Person – Jennifer Lawler
***
Nurturing Personal & Professional Growth
Exercising your five senses
There are five common senses of living a rich and rewarding existence.
The pun is intended. The innate understanding of how to build good lives
is a part of each and every one of us. The only difference between any
two individuals is where they might be within the process of discovering
how to access that knowledge. Consider what is often taken for granted -
use your eyes, ears, nose, mouth and hands in new ways. When anyone
starts down a path of personal or professional growth the initial
question is usually, “What do I do first?” Before you begin to
redecorate your home or send out resumes, assess where you are in the
moment. The goal is clear. Learn to believe you deserve the life you
dream of.
Schedule an intervention to de-program yourself. Give your eyes the
beauty you may feel you are missing in your life. Listen to new sounds
that transport your imagination to places you have only dreamt about.
Take a deep breathe and really feel how powerful fresh air is, or how
intoxicating a pure scent can be. Challenge your taste buds – “Through
the lips, over the gums, look out stomach here it comes!” Plan on a type
of tactile therapy, whether you go to a professional, visit a school for
massage or trade back rubs with a friend or significant other.
Remember, misery loves company. The moment you find your mouth running
off on a tirade about how you’re too tired, broke or out of shape to
attempt a change, STOP. Find the strength to laugh a little at yourself.
The truth is that even in the worst of times there is reason for hope.
If you are open to seeing them there are always signs of better things
to come. If the individual who rants and raves about life is not you,
but someone around you, call them on it. If they can’t see the glass
half full then try to clear their obstructed view of it. In the case of
a diehard pessimist don’t bother to try to convert them. With a sense of
compassion but not superiority let them be an anti-role model in your
life defining what you don’t want to be like and in turn direct your
life to serve as a positive example to everyone who comes into contact
with you.
People who don’t seem to get it are not as clueless as we might like to
think, but they are often stubborn. The security of well learned views
and well practiced behaviors is a habit that is hard to break. Build up
the courage to march proudly to your own drummer. When we give ourselves
the permission to nurture ourselves the result is often an appreciation
for our value as a human being. Once we see that worth, it’s easy to
make decisions about our personal and professional lives that lead us in
the right direction and reject those which do not. But, you need to make
the time to start the process.
If you do one thing…
do one or more of the ‘recommended’ items below.
Recommended Viewing
A
Sunset - Check the weather listings and schedule a date with this daily
miracle of nature.
This is an open eyed meditation.
Recommended Listening
Lullaby for the Moon - Japanese Music for the Koto & Shakuhachi by
Various Artists
Mythic Dreamer – Music for Native American Flute by R. Carlos Nakai
Recommended Inhaling
Kiehl’s Alcohol-Free Fragrance Sprays: Cucumber or Grapefruit
Recommended Tasting
Hot Sour Salty Sweet by Jeffrey Alford and Naomi Duguid
Find a recipe that peaks your interest and test it out on your taste
buds.
Recommended Touching
A
Long Hot Bath - is one of life’s simplest ways to have your whole body
embraced. A shower is just not the same.
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